[ GRAVEYARD ]

[sheriffexe]

GRAVEYARD

So, you're dead. Shame, that. But on the other hand, it's actually kind of nice. When you "wake" in some odd version of it, you'll find yourself lying on a rather plush bed. It's cozy and warm and just soft enough to tempt anyone back into sleep. The room is equally nice, if small, and when you turn and open the curtains to look out the window, you will see... wait, is that the town? It is, actually. The town is laid out quite simply across the window and no matter how many times you may bang or wave through the window, no one seems to notice you. If you're smart enough to give up the venture and leave the small bedroom, you will notice that, of course, you are on the train. The train that, is actually pretty fancy. Moving through it, past the sleeping cabins and through to the main carts, you will find a dining car with fine dishware and meals of all kinds made at a push of a button or a request given to the air. They'll appear, freshly made and ready to eat at the table of your choice with any drink you could want. There truly doesn't seem to be any limits when it comes to the luxury of the meal. There is also a bathhouse car with private bathrooms and saunas to fit up to four. Even one rather large room containing a small pool/hot tub of sorts is available for just about anyone to take a dip. It's kind of outlandish, honestly. Then the lounge car, with its library and plush armchairs and couches. A pool table, a darts board, even a small area dedicated to painting. There's a bar too, fully stocked and ready for anyone who needs a drink. All it would require is a request from the bartender who... looks surprisingly familiar? The Sheriff is there, much cleaner cut than his counterpart outside of the train. He looks up mildly at any arrivals, giving them a nod of greeting before going back to organizing bottles or setting cigars out for a smoke. He doesn't seem to be surprised at all by anyone who appears. Just... ready to serve them, whatever they may wish. It all sort of seems okay for a moment, until you realize you're just here to wait for the game to end. Awkward.

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Comments

[cherrypuncher]

[instantly:] You're not a horrible person.

[it's like he's asking to get shounened at]

So even if you don't say you're sorry, I want to let you know it's okay anyway.

[insincerely]

...

[Okay, he's back to walking away again.]

[cherrypuncher]

—why do you keep doing that?!

[FOLLOWING IMMEDIATELY]

[insincerely]

Well, I thought the conversation was over.

[cherrypuncher]

It's obviously not! [GRABBING HIS ARM AGAIN!!!] That's not how you end a conversation at all!

[insincerely]

[DAMN IT]

I wouldn't know.

[cherrypuncher]

First of all, you don't just walk away without saying anything! [she's so sincerely distressed but in a way where she's genuinely ready to teach him how conversations work] And I told you already I wanted to show you the dining cart and stuff, and I really did miss you, so I don't want you to just run off so soon...!

[again: a big dumb pink puppy]

[insincerely]

I don't need anyone to show me around. You do realize I'm not blind anymore, right?

[just let him escape]

[cherrypuncher]

That's not it! I just think it's really cool so I wanted to share it with you...

[there's never any escape hasn't he learned that by now]

And since it's been a little while since we've seen each other, I thought we could eat lunch together!

[insincerely]

Don't you have plenty of other friends to eat lunch with?

[cherrypuncher]

None of those friends are you, though!

[insincerely]

[GOD SHE AND MILLA ARE TOO SIMILAR]

Which is a good thing for everyone involved.

[cherrypuncher]

[IT'S WHY THEY'RE BFFSIES]

...Why's that?

[insincerely]

I'm not explaining this to you if you're too stupid to get it yourself.

[cherrypuncher]

I don't see what there is to get..! I missed you, and I wish it could've happened differently but I'm still happy to see you again, so I want to spend time with you! It's really simple!

[she's trying really hard]

[insincerely]

[Okay, coming from anyone but his sister, this all just feels so... weird. Why would you miss him???? He doesn't get it.]

Are you sure it's that simple?

[cherrypuncher]

I'm positive!

[is that a trick question?!?!]

[insincerely]

... Nope, still don't get it.

[Continues walking... continues dragging Yuna along, possibly...]

[cherrypuncher]

[definitely continues being dragged along. she keeps trying to dig her heels in but again, she weighs nothing]

What's there not to get?!

[what if she just kind of waits around to see how far he is willing to drag her]

[insincerely]

...

[He'll be merciful, because he's dragging her to the dining cart. He's honestly not even remotely hungry—being shot to death sort of put a downer on his appetite—but look, they're here.]

Well, what now?

[cherrypuncher]

[VICTORY...... she's not sure how much she expects them to actually have lunch but she's low on excuses to spend time with him around here; the train is fancy but so boring.

For now, though, she skips over to the nearest table, setting her hands down on it.]

Watch this! [And she takes a big deep breath, and declares at the empty space in front of her:] Chocolate cake, please!

[And when a chocolate cake just appears on the table, she grins like an idiot at him.]

[insincerely]

[... Heh. Everything about this situation still sucks—a lot—but there's something reassuring about Yuna's simple pleasures.

It's so stupid.

At this point, stupidity might as well be what he needs. Look at how far being "smart" got him, after all.]

Like I said, you're going to get fat.

[cherrypuncher]

I am not! [She's trying to act like she's taking great offense to this, but she also can't stop smiling. Having him stick around to make fun of her is a win, she figures.] I'll keep up with my exercise and it isn't even like I'm going to eat all of this by myself!

[insincerely]

... I hope you're not suggesting I'll eat it with you.

[cherrypuncher]

I could be if you want!

[it's not a picnic but!! still!!!]

Or you can pick something else, 'cause it'll work with any food you can think of!